Not all of your customers are going to like you.  There, I said it.  It doesn’t matter if you’re the best writer in the world.  You’ll still have people who don’t like your work, or you.  Or both!  No matter how thick your skin is, some of that hatred and bitterness gets past your armour.  When it comes to dealing with haters on a personal note, help is here!

Top tips for dealing with haters

It’s all well and good to know to keep your cool on a professional note, but haters are so frustrating from a personal side, too!  After all, when you love what you do, there’s going to be some personal connection, right?  

• You’re the messenger: They’re hating what you wrote not you.  Doesn’t always come out that way, of course, because their insults will be directed at you as a person and how you’re “stupid” or “lazy”, etc.  The thing is, they don’t know you.  Like, at all.  So, even though their words are pointy and aimed right at you, it’s actually the writing they’re responding to.  In the heat of the moment when you feel like throwing a chair through the window, or bawling on the floor, keep that in mind.

• Shake it off and remember who you are: This is obviously easier said than done, but it is something important to focus on.  Even if they think that you’re the worst writer in the world, it still doesn’t matter because you are more than just a writer.  You’re a human being with hobbies and goals and maybe a houseplant or two.  If you’re struggling with your professional identity at the moment (totally normal), remember the other parts of you and focus on those.  Maybe you can use this as the timely reminder to water your houseplant, too…

• Their words don’t determine your value: All jokes aside, this is seriously important.  Regardless of how hard their words are and how awful they are to you, nothing they say has any bearing on your value as a human being, even if they say otherwise.  You are valuable and important, and don’t let them take that power away from you.

Remember that haters come with the job

No matter what job you work, or how good you are at it, haters are everywhere.  It takes all kinds, right?  It doesn’t mean their comments are accurate, and we’ve all been there.  Many of us have been there more than once.  Make sure that you get help if you need it.  Vent to a trusted friend (or your houseplant), take some time away from your computer, and stay in control of your life.  They don’t own you unless you give them the power to do so.  Yes, their comments hurt.  Yes, you’re allowed to be angry and frustrated.  But if you give in and believe their insults, you’ve let them win.

The thing is, there is endless advice on what to do with haters from a professional standpoint (I will soon voice my own thoughts on the subject), but there’s a person behind every writer’s mask.  And that person needs help and guidance, too!

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